Art of Skateboarding / Sleestak Oregon Road Rage: August 2003(aka.AOS-Fest 2003 : West)
Words by Josh Schwarz, Photos by Chris & Steve Gump
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Cast of Characters:
- Bobcat; a.k.a. Hubcap, Admiral Nelson. -Huge dude, huge trickbag.
- POD; a.k.a. uhm….POD? -Burn victim. Father.
- Chris; a.k.a. CVW, POD2. -"Most dangerous skater…ever"
- Tom; a.k.a. Kehraus, Wildcard. -Living skate museum, deceiving partier.
- Strauss: a.k.a. SLUT. -Hick newbie NW'er.
- Josh; a.k.a. "Got the van keys?" - Driver. Sober… somewhat.
- Robert; a.k.a. Bean Dip, Sea Biscuit. -Carried sessions on his back. Rips.
- Max a.k.a.; MAX! - Vet of the trip, coffee addict. Hella Cool.
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WHAT ?: Get a bunch of dudes in a van to skate the most incredible terrain on earth…and party!!!!
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Bobcat and I arrived in town after a long ride back from Seattle late that night & headed down to one of the fine local establishments by my pad, where we eventually hooked up with POD.
See, Bobcat existed only in cyber-space up until this point & POD, well, I never knew could
exist. It'd been a while since I closed anything down and that's exactly what we did.
Needless to say, Friday got off to a lil' bit of a groggy start.
That morning Rhino stopped over & sported the crew some factory-fresh M/M sticks & then
we were off to find some greasy food & pick up the Van. Ahh, The Van - Huge… White… Clean.
So what was originally gonna be a few guys who collect skateboards & still managed to jump
on 'em once in a while turned out to be more of a 'who wants to hit it' schralp brigade. Turns out POD lived
just up the road from me, so that was stop number one. POD! Full of life, ready as ever & a few sheets
to the wind. Oh and a new daddy for all of about 20 minutes. Nonetheless, he was stoked. He had a new 'cycle…
starting it was another story. "Oh yeah, my buddy Robert's coming". Hell, we had a 15-seater, why not. Bean Dip.
All I can say is that dude can ride a skate…but we'll get to that later.
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Next stop: some other guy that's now comin' along.
Strauss. Another one of POD's hook-ups, who just moved up a week or so back from AZ I think. Don't know where he's
originally from, but wherever it is, it's a lil' hick. I was stoked - someone who has no idea what he's getting into.
Most of the shit we were gonna hit was poured by Red & crew. 'Nuff said.
Now we're going to pick up my skate-patnah Chris. Truthfully, I was a little leary on how
everybody was gonna get along on this thing. Well, when we pull up, Chris' got a tall-boy in hand & nobody
can make out a word uttered. This is when the weekend started. Everybody in the van can handle themselves
pretty good but were amazed that this guy nobody (but me) knew was already one-upping us. Off to Max's we go.
Max lives in like 'Pleasantville' or something. Suburban hell but on the way to our first stop.
So the vans pretty packed but we were short one player. Tom was having his ol' lady drop him off at the skatepark ,
where he'd jump in from there. Everybody was like who is this guy? Where do you know him from? I basically didn't
know shit about him, other that he has a pimp-azz old skate collection and was down for the trip. I said 'I dunno, he's a wildcard.' So
what happens? We meet up with him & dudes are like "You this Wildcard Fella?!" Pretty hilarious.
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NERDBERG(aka.Newberg)
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Our first destination was Newberg. You've either been there or heard of it. One giant-ass smooth-as-a-babies-butt creation
from Dreamland. It was kinda nice to look around and all over
the place there was somebody from our crew, rather than the standard shirtless jock 'tweens
that usually rip through the place. We were there more or less to shake the legs ( can you
believe it? Newberg, a leg-shaker? That's how spoiled we really all are…) and get out blood flowing.
Bobcat tricked just about everywhere while Tom partied in the big stuff. Robert was poppin off all over the place,
flowing in-and-out of everything. To take a quote from POD; " That was like the most fun I've ever had at Nerdberg"
and he was right. Strauss was blown away with the place, as any out-of-towner would be, as we kinda took the place over.
Shortly after, we were out. Kehraus broke out the green beers & scored a few new buddies from there. Beach-bound.
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LINCOLN CITY |
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Lincoln City is one of Oregon's older, yet wiser parks. The top part of the park, which was
Dreamlands first 'official' gig, has lights & big walls. The new addition is one of those
'beyond imagination' creations with a huge Cradle, a very deep end & is faster & smoother than
anything. Anywhere. As soon as we pull up, out comes the beers, party favors & as anticipated,
the local Ewoks. For those of you that haven't been, the Ewoks are a tribe of mostly teenage
skaters that live in the brush just beyond the park. It doesn't matter if it's 10 A.M. or 10 P.M. they trickle
out of the bushes to the sounds of cement & the whaft of pot smoke. Overall, they're pretty good kids.
There was a fairly large session taking place down at the new park. Halogin lights were propped up &
pointed at the Cradle for a few well-known skaters, with about 20 or so people lounging around the bowls.
POD & Chris were probably the most intoxicated, as they had no problem jumping right in & getting'
their grooves on. POD was barging like a champ, while Chris was, well, intoxicated. It made for some good
skate-watching. For the most part though, the rest of us were spending our evening up at the old section, which
gets deserted a little these days. It's still fast as f*ck & has held up really well over the years.
It came time to find somewhere to rest our heads & we ended up throwing down tents on the beach.
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THE FIRE |
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After everyone got their shit up, it was time to build a little fire. Well, that is if a little fire includes logs about 25 feet long.
Add up all the beers consumed with driftwood all around you & you got yourself a real doozie. So, we've got this
huge-ass fire with flames pouring about 50 yards down the beach and people, er, POD started to get a little crazy. Yeah,
I think jumping up & doing a dancing log-roll would be fun, don't you? Well, a couple jigs in & POD takes a
nose-dive right into the fire pit. I swear he was trying to 'swim' out. A couple guys react quickly & drug him out. I on the
other hand was standing there, ready to dump my Hamm's on him.
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Well, at least someone was on it. As he rolls out of it, there had to be
thousands of little burning embers all over his back. Fortunately, POD came out of it
better off than he could have, although his hand had plumped up a few sizes & turned a somewhat maroon color.
He wrapped a plastic bag on it & managed to regroup & continue the evening. He did, however,tell me that all
of the sand that got in there had heated up & formed glass on his palm….heh. And as is the case with most worthy moments,
this was not captured on film. Max, our resident photog, was well asleep by then. Something about a 10:00 bedtime. MAX!
Shortly after this all went down, Chris decided to disappear up to town for some smokes….or
something. A couple hours went by & we pretty much gave up on him. He pops back up a little before bedtime uttering
things like " Wild Turkey shots" and "Fat Hoars" . Classic.
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SATURDAY |
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Well, as any Oregon Coast skate brigade would do, we headed back up to the Lincoln City park. After breakfast, POD was hospital bound,
as his paw was looking a little on the rough side. This time the Cradle section was ours for the taking. And took it we did.
Bean Dip was charging that place like no one's business. Frontsides, backsides, roll-ins at top speed. It was awesome. Bobcat, er,
Hubcap had the pleasure of facing an ol' demon by hitting the LC Cradle for the first time since breaking his arm there just a month or so back.
Ever see a sasquatch go practically upside-down? I did. This was also my second time back & just being in this driven-environment upped
the stakes a bit. I hit it as good as I could & was told I just about grinded the side coping of the Cradle. Really? Well, I'll be….think I
just might have to shoot for it next time 'round. Pretty much everybody had a blast that morning. Strauss was shittin' his pants & havin a
hoot in there yelling "Slut" & hitting the loop pretty solid for a first-time Cradle robber. POD returned from the hospital &
barged full-on with a big ol' white gaused-up hand. Bean Dip scored his pick of the M/M decks as he pretty much stoked us out all morning.
As we were about to leave, the 'other white van' pulled up & was looking to take over. Have at it, we said as we were headed south.
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SLUTZ(aka. Siletz)
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Halfway between Lincoln City & the other park we were gonna hit was a town called Siletz that had
a park that, surprisingly, I had yet to encounter. Well, I didn't feel to bad about that after
we go there. It was a big poorly executed park for this part of the country and our stay was short.
Rusty coping, bike tracks abound, & kinky-tight trannies made for limited enjoyment.
Hubcap punctured his shin & was looking forward to his next tetnis shot. I think Chris was the
only guy who appreciated it. He's one of those 'quit yer bitching & just ride it' kinda guys.
Gnarly is as gnarly does. We heard numerous injury rumors in the van on the way there to boot,
so we were convinced this was built on an ancient Indian burial ground. If your ever in the area, stay at Lincoln City that extra hour. You'll thank me later…..
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PARABOLIC CRADLE-ISH THING(aka. Waldport) |
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I was more than eager to get to Waldport as I had been there just a few weeks back. I love it,
plain & simple. Built by Airspeed skateparks, they have their own interpritation of a Cradle.
This is more like a dish or bowl, set at maybe a 65 degree angle with a couple really nice
pockets leading in. The place has a nice 'race-track' type outer area if you into crazy lines.
I think everybody pretty much dug on it, although we were now starting to lose bodies at a
rapid pace. Koozies were a plenty by this point.
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A few of us, however, were charging, namely
Sea Buscuit. The cat lives for skating. He even gave up drinking to concentrate on his riding
a little more…until this weekend anyway. I finally stepped it up a notch & skated through the
'black' - the top section of the parabolic capsule. What a rush, it's more like hanging on for
dear life. Max was going for it & Strauss, again, was hitting it hard for someone who jus laid
eyes on it & had a good buzz on. As expected, just when our session was wrapping up, the
'other white van' pulls up. It's all yours. I didn't really pay too much attention to 'em, but Chris got a killer
shot of Dan Drehobel halfway through the black section - minutes after arrival. Pretty sick. If your on the Oregon coast, hit this place up.
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just Kehraus)
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GOT ZORLAC?(aka. The Kehraus Collection) |
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That evening, Kehraus had offered to put us up at his place for the night.
Now, earlier I mentioned that he had a skateboard collection. I too, collect
some '80s sticks from my younger days. Pshh. Well, no matter what your era,
this dude's got something for ya. Talk about eyecandy. Craig Johnson? Duane Peters?
Salba? Jay Adams? They're all here. You can see where I was a little surprised
by this guy lettin the lot of us into that house. It was a f*cking museum man.
He and his girlfriend were hella cool with it. We threw our tents up in the yard &
had some bevies, etc. as the night came quickly. Chris & Strauss managed to find a
little better buzz than others. POD was toast. He never left the van & I'm
pretty sure was buried under a stash of coolers & packs. A bunch of 30 & 40 y
ear olds & straight drinking & skating does a tired man make. To my surprise,
I woke up to a buttload of bacon, french toast, coffee - the works. We hung over, er,
out & caught the new Anti Hero flick, courtesy of Hubcap, for some inspiration on our last day.
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AUMSVILLE
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We packed up & headed just a short journey to what, I consider, the best patch of land on
mother earth…Aumsville. Talk about flow. This place takes the cake - killer, smooth trannies,
perfect steel coping, big walls…you name it. I think I've seen a quote somewhere "Aumsville's
for men". Not a place you drop off the kiddies, anyway. Even fewer of us rallied that morning,
but those who did were going all out. Bobcat was up to his usual antics of blowing your mind
on just what a guy with size 20 feet can pull off on a skateboard. Sea Buiscut was busting out
time after time & I was just going about my business of trying to find the killer line - which
isn't too hard 'cause they're everywhere. Max was mastering the pocket & Chris took a couple
runs. Everyone else was half-dead. POD & Strauss made the A.M. beer run, which would come
back to haunt them, or moreover us. Unfortunately our stay was shorter than, say, had we hit it earlier
on the trip but you can only go so hard I guess. Off to Donald we go.
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ONE MAN SHOW |
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By the time we got to Donald, pop. 750 we were just about done in.
We all hung out & watched Bean Dip tear it up (geez, maybe
that no drinking thing actually does help! Nah….) Dude was freakin
grind/rolling in the shallow over the stairs…even sicker considering how everyone
felt. Donald, by the way, is something like an $80k built park by Red & Co.
that has a kidney pool & a mini 'humpty' half pipe with extentions. For the
amount of space & money this thing took…just just incredible I tell ya.
It sees lot's of sun-down sessions & remains a northern Oregon favorite
for those who crave the pool coping. A few of us piddled around, but as par for the
course, sat back & caught the Sea buscuit show. Before you know it, it was time
to head home…..We made the rounds & dropped everyone off at their respective homes.
Everyone involved had a great time, got to meet people that they probably would never have,
skated & partied pretty damn hard. I definitely had a great time & thank everyone
that helped out along the way.
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Movies for your enjoyment (they may take awhile to download):
http://www.sleestak.net/~maxm/Roadrage/RobertDonald.mpg
http://www.sleestak.net/~maxm/Roadrage/Robert.mpg
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Many thanks go out to:
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